Wednesday, January 28, 2009

I Dread the Day

Yes, I dread the day when I will be alone in our abode of three bedrooms, two bathrooms, one small kitchen and dining room, one elongated living room, a dirty kitchen, a laundry area and a small garage with no car to park.
I really dread the day when I will no longer hear banging of carelessly closed doors of my children’s bedroom, of footsteps that march in and out of my bedroom even while I’m deeply asleep.

I truly dread the day when there will be no more kids to hug me goodnight, to greet me good morning, to bid me goodbye before they leave for school.

I dread the day when there will be one to ask me what I had prepared for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

I simply dread the day when there will be no kids to be given a weekly allowance and allowances for attending contests, workshops, seminars and conferences.

I dread the day when there will be no one to greet me when I arrive home from office, to ask me how was my day in work, to tell me I am a bit intolerable in some moments, to tell me, “you’re the best Mom in the world”.

Because two years from now, all my children will be in college. And surely they will be leaving me to have their own dreams realized.

But I look forward to the days when they will be home for the semestral breaks, for the summer vacations, for the Christmas and New Year’s Holidays.

I will happily look forward to the days when they will be with me again and ask me to cook their favorite dishes, their favorite snacks and other delicacies they used to have when they’re still home.

I will certainly look forward to the days when doors of bedrooms will be banging again, when one after the other troops to my room just to see me or tell unnecessary things or just to have my attention diverted to them.

I will surely look forward to the days when we can again bond together as a family by going to places they like best like the beach, the mountains and many other places.

Life’s a journey. There are stations, one must need to gas up, one must take a break, one must continue to travel, others will alight, and still others will take another ride. But the destination will be one great dream if truly realized.

My children will leave me, to take a journey. Somewhere along the way, the road may be smooth or bumpy, but the end therewith is yet to be seen. I cross my fingers with prayers that God will guide them all along the way. And have their wagon hitched to a star.

Monday, January 26, 2009

$4.72 Richer

Yes! Blogging made me $4.72 richer at the end of 2008. Thanks to Googles Adsense. I only found out yesterday when I tried to open my Adsense account. $4.72 only for 2008? Of course, yes! Because I only started having my blogsite late November 2008 and had only been able to let Google advertise into my blogsite sometime in December 2008 because it took me weeks before I was able to follow instructions set by Adsense and so that advertisers can crawl into my blogsite.

Sir Gie, thanks for encouraging me to do so. If I am to assess the popularity of your blogsite now, I believe you’re now a hundred dollars richer than I am because you started blogging earlier and I believe that you have wider circle of friends and followers of your weblog. If it’s not too much of the asking, please help me publicize my site too, even to your students only.

Now blogging doesn’t only cure migraines. It’s not just a way to escape boredom and homesickness. But the great side of it, it does give you money, folks! I am a living testament to that.

When I relayed my humble achievement to my classmate, Sir Gie, he texted me back, “Great”!

When I relayed the news to my daughter, she suddenly started to become interested in visiting my blogsite. Why not! I said to her. Let us earn money the exciting way. Who knows, by the end of 2009, I’ll be a thousand dollars richer? And I could do that if I’ll get serious blogging. Without any capital, but just to escape boredom and homesickness, and heal migraines, I can write for as long as I wish to.

But for now, I am not yet collecting what I earned from Adsense. I deferred being paid for the time being. I may as well have them pay me when I have a hundred dollars or more into my Adsense account.

See, what blogging can do? Try it and you’ll say I am really serious and I truly got $4.72 richer as of this writing!

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

And He Said, "Yes, Sweetie"

Before I will forget what am gonna share you this time, let me tap, tap, tap on my laptop now, though its already quite late in the evening, the truth is, I can’t sleep because of too much excitement.

For he said an hour ago when he called, “yes”, “sure”, “why not”, “okay”; and he used all the affirmatives he can think of maybe. He said I will book tomorrow my flight in going to Manila when I will be meeting him at the NAIA when he arrives after an eight months work in a place so many miles away, as well as our flight back home from Manila, via Tuguegarao. I’ll be boarding a plane twice in just a matter of 24 hours, you see?

Isn’t that something I can be excited about? At last, I can soon experience how to travel on air. Ha ha ha. Goosebumps. . . I feel nervous and truly eager. How I wish it will be tomorrow already, just to immediately satiate my excitement.

FYI, it took me a lot of convincing for my husband to say yes and agree to my proposal. Maybe, when I said I’ll take charge of the air fare, and use my credit card, he thought he’s spared of the expenses. Of course not, payments for my card will surely come from him.

Honestly, I proposed that I take the plane to and from Manila due to the following logical and practical reasons:

First, the fare of taking the bus (RCJ or Florida) is more less the same as taking the plane (P730.00 for the bus; P788.00 for the plane, and this includes all taxes);

Second, lesser travel time as taking the bus will take you 12 hours to travel while in a plane, it’s just an hour; and

Third, it will give you lesser stress and fatigue.

So guys, travel through the reasonable and sensible way. Take the plane. If it’s your first time, it’s a treat, too. And for sure, you will have your second, third and many more plane rides. For cheaper rates, book earlier.

It’s my first time, you know! If the experience is satisfying, it tends to be repeated. Ha ha ha. I’ll soon be a loyal costumer of PAL and will be able to earn mileage until such time that I will be able to travel abroad through my mileage earnings. It’s quite an ambitious dream. But who knows?

Monday, January 05, 2009

You Can Heal Your Life

After writing a series of blogs ready for posting anytime I have time to do it, I thought I need a good rest already. I got tired writing this time. But then, while languorously lying in my humungous bed, I thought it will do me good if I tune in to a TV channel while I relax. I have surfed channels until I reached Studio 23. Its Oprah Winfrey’s show, the most popular and the highest paid highest earning TV Show and host in the entire planet, if my memory serves me right.

Reality struck me like lightning. It was because a few years back, I felt like giving up on life. I was easily disappointed. My frustration tolerance was so low. I easily cry on nonsense things. I was often told I was like a cry-baby. I was easily hurt. My hurt threshold was so low. I felt as was not good enough as a person. I was a very sensitive person. Because I can’t take anymore what’s going on before me, I even attempted to murder (that’s too brutal, isn’t it?) my own life, but thank goodness, it was a failure. The syrup I was drinking was for infants then, so it was not too strong to make me hallucinate until I will loss consciousness and later on, stop breathing due to over dosage.

One among Oprah’s guests in that episode of her show was Louise Hay, author of the book, You Can Heal Your Life.

Making positive statements in your life. Life is a journey. Positive energies. Bubbles in life. The power of positive thinking. These were expressed at random in her show by her guests-writers-authors who are out to promote their books.

I got Oprah’s and her guests’ message loud and clear. You can heal your life. And I am with them now when they said that. After all, life is a journey. Life must be lived with positive energies. We must live our life happily coupled with positive thinking. There may be bubbles along the way, but they give color and add meaning into our lives. There maybe ups and downs along the way, but they are just spices that will make us a better person. More so, if we make positive statements in our life, we become a more realistic person. Our dreams become reachable, our vision more attainable.

I feel I am a new person now. I have overcome things which could have completely ruined my life. I am a better person now. I can face the world with pride but with a humble heart and spirit. I have great dreams now, for my family and for myself. I am starting to appreciate this life God gave me. As I look around, I see beauty in every creature God created for us. For every hugs and kisses and words of love and encouragement from my kids, my hubby and few best friends, I feel an adrenalin rush, a rush that encourages me to live longer and to enjoy to the fullest this gift of life. Yes, we can heal our lives. I just did.

Badoodles' Fan

Nagkaroon ng simpleng Rizal Day Celebration ang aming opisina kanina. Our mayor passed a memo last week before the Christmas vacation informing us all officers and employees to attend the wreath-laying ceremonies at 7:30 in the morning at Rizal Park. I was quite late. Dramatic entrance pa ang dating ko. Lagot ako kay SAO II, aga pa naman niyang tumawag sa akin. Medyo pumuwesto ako sa may likuran, yung di gaanong halata na ako’y nahuli sa pagdating. Pero sa kaswertehang-palad, ha ha ha, may mas nahuli pang lima sa akin. So, ayos na naman feeling ko. Lusot na naman ako sa halimbawang bintang nila na ako na pinakalate.

Pagkatapos ng simpleng seremonyas, at siyangapala, the flowers were already offered at the foot of Rizal’s freshly painted monument when I arrived, and bale yung mga patawa na lang na mensahe ng bise ang nadatnan ko, saka nag-uwian na ang lahat, kanya-kanyang lakad na mga kaopisina ko. You know what, ni isa walang pumansin sa akin? Di kaya nila ako nakita? Wow ha. . . parang nashock ako dun. Napaginitan ko na lang pumanta sa internet café at duon ko ibinunton ang pagkamuhi ko sa sirili ko kung bakit deadma sila sa akin this morning.

I opened my gmail account. Opppsss…since naging tiga-subaybay na ko ni badoodles, may pumasok na message informing me that he has his latest blog posted in his site. Binasa ko, at nagcomment pa ko ha, ng tatlong beses. Panu naman kasi, di ko pa na oneclick yung pagtatype ko ng blogsite ko para lang mapabilang ako sa mga tambay sa site niya. Ewan ko kung pagbibigyan niya ko. At you know pa, ginamit ko pang pampalakas sa kanya na ako’y classmate ni Sir Gie, na isa na ring tambay sa site niya, and that’s very very true, at sya pa ang nag-encourage sa akin na magsulat and have my own blogsite. “No regrets Sir Gie, I enjoy blogging. Thanks to your encouragement.”

Ngayon, kahit tulog na tulog na ko at tumutulo na laway ko sa himbing ng tulog, at may napanaginipan ako, yun, bigla na lang akong babangon at isusulat ko ang mga makatuturan kong panaginip. Hanep sa tindi ng interes ko sa pagsusulat. Kasi, pag d ko pa sinulat agad eh makakalimutan ko na yun, pag gising na gising na ang aking diwa at kaluluwa. It seems that the flow of wonderful ideas in my mind is more real and sensible when I am writing half-awake, half-asleep. Pareho din yata yon. Kalahating gising at kalahating tulog? Aha, parang nasasapian, ganun ba? O di kaya’y sadyang madaldal lang ako, pero kahit paano, may konting sense, o di ba?

Yes, as if uhaw na uhaw ako sa hilig kong magsulat. FYI, nung highschool pa kasi ako naturuang magsulat. O kaya’y ipinanganak na siguro ako na may hilig sa pagsusulat. Sinubukan ko pa ngang imemorize yung laman ng isang pocket-sized dictionary nung higschool ako, pero sabi ng mga magulang ko, baka daw sa mental bagsak ko.

Thanks to the untiring patience, guidance and prodding of our English teacher nuon, the late Miss Cristina Nefulda. She died a virgin, you know! May her soul rest in peace!

During the workshops and rigorous trainings she gave us then, kasama ko si Sir Gie nuon, (we are the cream of the class kasi eh, he he he) she would continuously tell us to write anything, just anything we can think of that would give meaning to our existence. Eh kung ganun katindi and encouragement niya, eh di ang daling matuto. Ako pa naman yung taong may konting tipak sa brain ko na tinatawag na teachable, madaling matuto at maimpluwensiyahan. Tong istayl ng pagsusulat ko nga ngayon eh impluwensiya ni Badoodles. Wala nga lang element of sarcasm, yung tinatawag ni Sir Gie na anghang. Di ko kayang magpatutsada. Baka tanggalin ako sa opisina. Clean writing na lang gagawin ko na may konting patawa. Yun ay kung gusto ng mga readers ko na tumawa sa mga sinusulat ko. At least, may maisusulat or sinusulat ako. “I write to escape, to escape boredom.” Yan ang aking kasabihan ngayon.

So nagsulat ako ng nagsulat. Pero nung gabi ng December 27, gusto kong magalit kay Sir Gie. Sabi ba naman niya, siya lang ang nanalo sa national presscon nuong hayskul pa lang kami. Pero di ko na kinontra dahil hanggang regional level lang naman ako nanalo eh. Pero ipinagmalaki niya yun sa mga anak ko. Sakit nun ha. Mas magaling pala Tito Jun nila kesa sa Mom nila. Buwelta ko naman, “yang panganay ko classmate eh Editor-In-Chief sa school paper nila na The Tradean nung highschool siya, pero tamad lang magsulat ngayon” sabi ko. “Oh really?” sabi niya na parang namangha. Yehey. . . nakabawi ako. Like mother like daughter, di ba? Tapos sabi niya sa anak ko, “Why don’t you write and have your own blogsite anak.” Ngiti lang ang isinukli niya kay Sir Gie kasi naman busy siya sa katetext kay Superman ng buhay niya. Yun na siguro pinakamahalaga sa mga sandaling yun sa aking unica hija. Ang makipagtext. Sabi ko nga sa mga anak ko, malapit na silang magkafinger arthritis. Biruin nyo, sa loob ng apat na buwan eh 42,000 text messages na ang naisend niya daw? Gusto kong magalit, kasi kahit naka unlitxt sila, pera pa rin ang puhunan nila sa pagtetext.

Balik tayo sa tamang usapan: Gusto ko pa sanang idagdag, just to vouch that I have the genes of a writer, ha ha ha, na puedeng namana ng aking mga anak, kasi nga yung bunsong anak ko eh National Champion nung Grade VI siya sa Infomercial Broadcasting in English and he also grabbed the second spot sa Copyreading and Headline Wrting in English sa National Presscon sa Baguio City, two years ago, pero, di na, baka sabihin nya, medyo mahangin sa labas, o kaya’y parang magaan yung bangkong buhatin. ( di niya naman sasabihin yon, napakabait na tao ni Sir Gie, take and take na lang siya siguro) Eh masungit lang kasi akong magturo sa aking mga anak. Takot lang nila sa ‘kin pag di sila nanalo. (Sir Gie, parang di na okey tong sinusulat ko, pero totoo naman lahat eh.)

Pero alam niyo? Pagdating namin ng bahay, parang narinig lahat ng aking dalaga ang mga pinagsasabi ni Sir Gie nung gabing yon. She only has great appreciations for Tito Jun (that’s how they call him). He is a very intellectual and lovable person daw. Of which, totoo naman yon. Tama yon. Mas magaling siya talaga sa akin nung highschool kami. Lovable din ako, pero di niya ko minahal, huhuhu, joke. . . ha ha ha. Gising ako! di ako nanaginip noh!

To cap it all, masayang tumambay sa site ni Badoodles, may positive energy na nahihigop, gaya ng kasalukuyang nangyayari sa akin. But followers, today is December 30, 2008 at di ko alam kung kailan ko maipopost tong sinulat ko dahil nga walang net sa bahay. Matatapos na ang taon pero hanggang ngayon, manhid pa rin ang lahat. Di nila magets yung hiling kong Smart Bro. Siguro pagdating na lang ng hubby-daddy ko mula sa malayong laot eh magdadrama ako ng katakut-takot para lang maibili niya ko ng gusto ko.

Ang saya-saya! He he he. . . See yah later, folks!