Monday, December 08, 2008

The Best Alarm Clock

C’mon, every one of us needs an alarm clock. It is an indispensable gadget for pupils, students, teachers, working dads and working moms like me.

As a gadget, we have different preferences on what kind of alarm clock we use. Some just use their cell phones for practical reasons, others go to the store to buy the handy, convenient and cheap type of the gadget, and still others buy an alarm clock that matches their personality. They may be hip, classic, imported, fashionable, and trendy, you name it, and they have it.

But for us at home, we have the greatest, the most classic, the most practical, the cheapest, the most unique, the best, yet the most irritating, the most annoying, infuriating, something that gets on your nerves and the earliest to sound a wake-up call even though not set to the time we really want it to be bursting, yet it will just alarm naturally. And we don’t need to spend a dime or two just to have one.

However, if I would be given a choice, I will never ever covet or wish to have such kind and brand of alarm clock. I’d prefer to spend an amount just to have the most realistic alarm clock. I know and am sure that you, too, will never want to have one like ours.

I’ve kept you hanging in the air for so long now. And I guess you’re just as excited to know as I am quite hesitant to reveal to you what kind of alarm clock I am talking about.

Voila! Our alarm clock is nothing else but our NEIGHBORS!

Our neighbors. Yes, our neighbors who start to be as noisy as they can as early as 4 o’clock in the morning. They produce an alarm that’s as irritating and as annoying as anyone can imagine. They are an assortment, like “pinakbet”, like “chopsuey”.

There’s a neighbor who’s shouting at the top of her voice because of trying to discipline a 3 year old son who’s got the worst tantrum that nobody can pacify. (This is a behavior of a child I’m quite exasperated to watch and listen to and will never tolerate). Then there’s this neighbor whose habit is to hurl invectives against his alcoholic husband. (It’s their early morning rituals that have been practiced since the time we moved to reside in this neighborhood). And there’s a neighbor who’s used to giving the first hour Sermon on the Mount to her daughter when there’s no need to do it. And then there are these neighbor’s little kids who start to cry simultaneously with the crowing of the cocks because of lack of attention.

There’s the good side of it, anyway. You don’t need to buy batteries for regular battery change as done in the real gadget. You don’t need to worry that you were not able to set it because whether you like it or not, they will just alarm voluntarily. And you can’t set them off much to your desire to do it for reason that you still don’t want to wake up, because they will continue to sound since there’s no manual on and off features of them. They will just ebb and sound off naturally when everybody’s left for school and work. It’s kind of useless already.

There’s also the aesthetic value of it. When the scenario is interesting, you would be watching a free circus, a free movie where you don’t need to buy tickets anymore. You can have a free entertainment. At times when the sermon goes off-hand you kinda be watching a shooting and in some instances, you may be forced to be an extra. You may opt to act as an in-between to the warring neighbors. But for me, let them! I have nothing to do with these kinds of neighbors. That’s their personal business, let them enjoy. I can survive in peace despite their natural behaviors. It’s just being used to it. It’s like acclimatizing. Survival of the fittest!

But if I will be given another chance, I would like to put up a house in a place where’s there’s peace and quite and open space. A place where my alarm clocks will just be the sound of cocks/chickens crowing, birds chirping, frogs croaking, bees humming, winds blowing softly, cows mooing. A place where there’s tranquility and contentment.

If you can find and be in this place, there would be sheer joy and contentment in life. For I believe that life lived simply is a happy life, sans the need of alarm clocks.

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