Sunday, March 14, 2010

Underneath A Quixotic, Pale Moonlight

Underneath a quixotic, pale moonlight,
Are God's wonderful, human creations;
We hear echoes and murmurings at night.

Mischievous guys planned they would meet tonight,
Some pretty gals who've shown hesitations;
Underneath a quixotic, pale moonlight.

Lovers walking in the beach, hands clasped tight,
Whispering sweet nothings and revelations;
We hear echoes and murmurings at night.

Children playing hide and seek, what a sight,
Mocking with glee, much anticipations;
Underneath a quixotic, pale moonlight.

Husband and wife banter in trivial fights,
Laughing, snuggling after such orations;
We hear echoes and murmurings at night.

And I would share with my own valiant knight,
Such bliss counting stars' constellations,
Underneath a quixotic, pale moonlight;
We hear echoes and murmurings at night. 


About the poem:

This is a Villanelle, a fixed 19 line form. Six stanzas. It repeats lines in a set pattern and has only two ryhmes. The rhyme scheme is aba, aba, aba, aba, aba, abaa. Line 1 repeats in line 6, 12, 18 and Line 3 repeats in lines 9, 15, 19.

Quite a challenging and an enjoyable way of writing a poem...though this piece is my first attempt.... :)

Written for One Single Impression (Prompt: Murmur)
Photo Courtesy

Also submitted to Thursday Poets Rally - Week 32


  1. I never knew there are so many rigid requirements to bring out a poem of such great charm.Do these rules restrict the poet's natural flow or makes the job challengingly interesting? Only Amity can reply.But I am left with a sense of peace and satisfaction after reading this Villanelle.

  2. I'm here after long time, and i'm stunned to see u becoming matured day by day...wel amity, do well...:) and thanks for ur sweet comments in my blog..soo happy to get them..:) thanks a ton...

  3. really good write...the poetry form does sound quite difficult...enjoyed reading this!

  4. Well done -- I have written but a handful of villanelle's, and find they are not easy to make engaaging... bravo...
    Here is my murmur...

  5. Hi Amity
    You are really talented with your poems :))))))
    Its BEAUTIFUL !!!!!!!
    I give you a golden pen to write more .......... LOL
    Enjoy your sunday
    Kareltje =^.^=
    Anya :-)

  6. Amity, quite a challenge to craft indeed. I like your selection of repeating lines and the images your poem creates. For a first try, you have done very well! Your poems get better and better.

  7. hmm.. Amitea is experimenting with forms and doin it darn well! :D

    this was quite the murmur! :)

  8. lovely...the musical murmurings of
    life - written so lovingly.

  9. Dear Amity,
    Good Evening!
    A real quality work!Hats off to you,dear!
    I loved the picture and the lines.soothing and pleasing.
    When the moon shines in the sky,
    When we are left alone,
    The heart really aches!
    Even to enjoy the beauty of nature,
    We need the presence of our loved ones!
    Wishing you a wonderful Sunday,

  10. The reading of this poem was quite a delight as I heard the murmuring in the night :)

  11. Not an easy form to take on, but you did it well. Enjoyed it!

  12. I don't know anything about form, but I enjoyed the images you portrayed with it.

  13. Villanelles are quite challenging and you did a fantastic job!

  14. Great first attempt at what looks a very challenging form.

  15. Wow, you did a wonderful job...lovely words!

  16. KP;

    Thank you so much. It was really challenging...

  17. hey Prams;

    glad ur back...:) i've missed you, don't you know that?

    thanks you so much dear for finding time to be here in spite of your busy life... :)

    have a great week ahead!

  18. Aayushi;

    Thanks so much. Yeah, quite difficult to write...:)

  19. Rob;

    Thank you so much. Quite a challenge for me and glad u liked it!

  20. Anthony;

    yes and thank you so much!

  21. Snow White;

    Thank a lot dear...:)

    Will visit yours, too, soon!


  22. Hi Anya;

    Golden pen? Woww....lols...:)

    Thanks Kareltje for the gift!

    HUgs to both of you!

  23. Rob;

    Thank you so much and your comments are encouraging...:) It's even a challenge for me to write better...:)

    Hope this is not my first attempt but just a beginning of more to come!

  24. Sandy;

    Isn't it a nice murmur?

    Thanks a lot Sandy!

    Have a great week ahead!

  25. Leo;

    yeah, i did try it and thanks it came out fine...:)


    Amitea! yeyyy...what a tea!

  26. Mia;

    yes, so true! glad u liked it!

    good morning!

  27. Hi Anu;

    Very, very true!

    Thanks so much and I am so glad of your comment!

    have a great week ahead!



  28. Maggie;

    thanks so much...:) glad u liked it!

  29. Mojo;

    thanks so much...i read and research on poems so i try...if not, i write on free verse where no one is bound by rules...:)

  30. Hey Amity, you are a good teacher. I like this one, I know it presented a challenge and you did well by it.
    Your poem is one that would make Don Quixote proud of the quixotic, pale moonlight situtation you portray.
    Villanelle, hmm. I've not run across this before.
    Thank you, :)

  31. A comment from Yousei Hime (sent thru mail, I am posting it here for others to read):

    Well done. This is a difficult form to write so that the meaning flows without a heavy feeling of repetition. You did well. Be pleased.

    Yousei Hime

  32. Sol;

    Thanks so much happy to note that!

  33. Sweetest in the Gale..

    Oh really? wow....thanks dear!

    You made me happy here like all the others!

  34. Hello Jim;

    Yes Jim, I am a teacher by profession...:)

    Yeah, Don Quixote? I first used the word "romantic" but sounds to me in all my other poems that it's been overused so i changed it to quixotic...:)

    Glad it came out well!

    Thanks Jim, try it, the rule is there!

  35. I have not try this form of poetry but it sounds good to me, I get a sad feeling from this, I especially like the first line - it really sets the start of the poem quite well

  36. HI Lissa;

    You haven't tried? Try it, the rule is there...:)

    You will surely enjoy writing it!

    Thanks so much dear!

  37. What an intriguing poem. Really enjoyed reading this and a great take on the prompt.

  38. amazing that this is the results of your first attempt at this sort of poetry. It is a wonderful poem and I love the flow of your words.

  39. Hi Geraldine;

    Thank you so much. Glad you enjoyed it!

    Good morning!

  40. Hello Tammie;

    Honestly, it's my first attemt...t'was quite hard but I enjoyed writing it!

    I may also try some other forms, depending on how kind my thoughts are to me.

    Thank you so much and glad you like.

    Good morning!

  41. Amity Dear,

    How To Write For AO ?? Pls Tel Me Abt The Procedure....

  42. Dear Sahana;

    Check ur mail, i've given u the procedure already...see you at AO... :)

  43. Beautiful villanelle. I find them extrememly difficult to write but yours flows with sensitivity and creativity.

  44. Hi Sue;

    Thanks so much, but I was quite challenged to try it and am happy it came out good!

    Good morning!

  45. Wow, this is beautiful. Such a difficult form, but you truly mastered it!

  46. Bernadine;

    Thank you so much! Glad you like it!

  47. Wow! Beautiful flow and a gentle eternal awareness,The repetition feels soft, like moonlight.

  48. Gabrielle;

    Thanks a lot dear...:) feels so soothing, isn't it!

    Glad you like it... :)

    Have a great weekend...:)

  49. very nice poem. I like all the perspectives on rommance... I really enjoyed reading it!

  50. I enjoyed the poem very much.
    I have only very limited knowledge about poems.Still I write them and enjoy .Here your description made me to understand this poem better.
    Your imagery is also beautiful.My entry is

  51. Thanks Jingle...thank you so much for the awards...just tell me how to claim it.. :-)